Where's the Animal Liberation Front when you need them

I'm not even going to explain this one...

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Guy: I have a question

Me: Shoot

Guy: About fetish

Me: Yeah?

Guy: And I really really love it..

Guy: Can you play a mean girl?

Guy: Very mean?

Me: I AM a very mean girl, so playing is not an option...

Guy: If I came by your house

Guy: With a box

Guy: A big cardboard box

Guy: And you opened it

Guy: And you saw 5 huge rabbits

Guy: Stolen from a spoiled neighbour kid

Guy: Something like that...

Guy: ?

Me: ...

Me: Rabbits...

Guy: Yes

Me: What do you want me to do with those

Guy: Rabbits... high heels..

Guy: Just think of something

Me: No I don't hurt animals, just humans

Guy: Ok

Guy: Respect...

*Guy leaves chat*

Some guys just don't get it..

A guy enters the room, and we start a kinda sexual conversation, quite enjoyable. Then he asks me what I would enjoy if he was there. I reply (in my dominant role)

Me: I think I would enjoy hurting you
Guy: Hmm, how?
Guy: You're making me horny
Me: I don't know if that would make you horny, my intentions would be to see how you would handle pain
Guy: Mmm true
Me: I think I would enjoy a bit of Cock and Ball Torture... maybe that would make you horny..

So untill then it went alright, the guy seemed to like the SM thing. But sometimes.. men just don't get the femdom thing (I act like a Femdomme, irl I switch but I just don't want to act submissive on cam)

Guy: I like a girl who's bossy and in charge

Guy: Then I tie you up and fuck you hard

Me: Excuse me? You tie me up?

Guy: Yeah, totally

Me: And just now you told me you liked girls who are in charge?

Guy: Hmmm yeah

Guy: And then I fuck you real hard

Guy: And cum on your face

Guy: mmmmmm

Well, I kinda gave up being dominant to him. Some people just don't get it!

Attention-lovers

Some guys just want someone to look at what they're doing because it turns them on. They are quick, to the point en fast to go. This is a perfect example that just happened...


Me: Hi ***
Me: How are you?
Guy: Yes
Guy: I'm fucking my ass with a dildo
Me: Okay
Me: And liking it?
Guy: mmm yes
Me: How exciting ;)
*guy puts his webcam on, insert me with a holy-fuck!-face because the guy is using a dildo the size of a chair leg*
Me: Woah
Me: You're hardcore!
"a" heeft de chat verlaten


And that took about 2 minutes... Ah well, if it turns them on, why not.

Quiet times

It's been a bit quiet due to holidays and busy schedules. But I haven't forgotten you guys! Have some patience, and crazy things will happen again soon enough. ;) Until then, here's a hilarious website if you like porn bloopers.

Pornfail

Geek-dar

Some time ago, a kinda nerdy guy logged on to my chatbox, and we started an enjoyable conversation. Not too sexual, but not dirty, it was nice. But the thing was, my geek-dar went off, and I just couldn't resist.

After ten minutes, I just couldn't put on a straight face and be sexy, because we we're chatting on and on about live-action-roleplaying, Dungeons and Dragons, Power metal and stuff. I felt so guilty 'cause he logged on for a dirty chat, and he got a nerdy fangirl gibbering on about fantasy en metal.

After half an hour I felt so guilty because he was paying for this, I pointed him to a bdsm-forum of which I'm also a member, because he was a nice guy, and we could meet up again there.

And he did! Until now this was the only time my geek-dar went off, but I hope it does more often, 'cause it was hilarious!

From insects to...

Some guy had a weird way of outing his fetish.. After a short conversation about fetish shoes he came to this:

Guy: I have a weird question

Me: Go ahead

Guy: What do you do when you see an insect on the floor?

Euhm, okay. Weird question. I didn't pick up with his subtle hints, even after this:

Guy: Do you ever step on bugs?

Me: Ehm, I try not to, poor bugs

But after this I finally got it:

Guy: Hehe, and do you step on them with your full weight?

Me: Lol, does that turn you on?

Me: Oh trampling!

Guy: *blush* yeah kinda

Guy: I sometimes dream about being a bug and being stepped on by a girl

He could've just said trampling right away! But having a guess is fun too, and kinde cute because he was really shy about it. But we talked for half an hour about being trampled and insects. Yeah!

Come to the dark side...

We have cookies!


Unfortunately I don't have the log anymore, because I lost it on another computer. But I had the greatest time with this one guy. He was a normal guy, not into kinky stuff, so I put my cute-girl-next-door-face on, but as always, the conversation topic turns to kinky.
Well, the guy was so flabbergasted by me, and he wanted to do everything for me... Teehee *angelface*


The guy was so blown away, all his inhibitions blew away. It was totally awesome! He did everything I said, he loved it. His expierences were limited to missionary and maybe some doggystyle, but in the end he had clothespins on his nippels, had a finger up his ass, and was cumming over my name he'd written on his belly.


It rocked, he had a great time, and it was the first time I fully enjoyed dominating a guy from work. It felt really true because he was so honest en totally devoted to do anything I wanted. 


And the most fun thing of all... I lured another one over to the dark side. Mission accomplished!